It’s been a long time since I reflected. Each time I want to, I’m dead tired. Tonight i’ll make some effort to write at least a few more lines….

You know there’s no denying that there is more to life than work. In fact, there is more to life than friends and family. There is that void that needs to be filled by a special someone. And each time I stop working, that void engulfs me. I never understood why some people became desperate for a girlfriend or a one-night stand or a desperate blind date or something. But I do now.

It’s to fill a void. An emptiness that seems to make you sigh repeatedly. Once again it’s interesting to watch myself. Each time I talk to a girl, either online and offline, i’m going like…"It’s nice talking to her. Maybe I like her. But neah…she won’t like me. At least not that way." Then I wonder, maybe i could ask her for a date. Not exactly a date…but more of a one-evening date. You know? Have coffee, catch a movie perhaps? How about I buy you dinner and send you home? Then that’s it. Nope. No sex. Just an evening of false companionship. And definitely no commitment. I don’t want you hounding my phone or my MSN or asking me if everything’s ok. I just want to flirt with you, make you feel worshipped a bit. And maybe have you play hard to catch with me.

The thought of being able to just enjoy the moment would suffice.

I understand the loneliness.

And as I write that, my eyes are fluttering telling me to sleep because I need to wake up at 4 to prepare for my morning tutorials and perhaps do some work…There is still so much to do….I have to explain to my tutor how I didn’t go for my first tutorial with him because I saw the wrong tutorial group number and I ended going for my first tutorial with another professor. Then I have to settle the server error for the project that i’m working on with darren. Then I need to prepare for this thursday’s programming lab. And plan for next week’s circuit design lab.

I’m starting to work more for splazz and xsmatter. And somehow i feel that i’m leading the pack…and i need to set the example. This year. academic year 06/07. I will be a dean’s lister. and at worst, i will miss it by a point or 2.

Good night.