I sit here with so many thoughts running through my head yet when i pick one to write about…the words fail me.

I love my father. I’d like to tell him to stop being so apologetic for not being able to give his children more…because he’s done more than we can ever ask for.

While sleeping a few days, I dreamt of Mikeller(One of last year’s NTU pageant contestant). I thought it was funny because I’ve only seen her twice. And the dream itself was this…I coincidentally was in the same building as some graduation party she was having and I was so sleepy that I went into the female washroom, plonked myself down on one the cubicle floor, closed the WC lid and slept. Mikeller later walks in and is shocked to find me. Haha. Effectively, I dreamt of sleeping. Must be a sign that I’m too tired.

My life is passing me by these days. I’m losing touch with my friends and i haven’t been able to find enough time to spend time with them. Even Zhiyong’s back in Australia..and I didn’t even say goodbye. In fact, I forgot he even left until malcolm told me the day after. Sheesh. Talk about me being  a good friend.

I just insulted a friend over MSN unintentionally. The feeling sucks. This is why I don’t make a good friend.

It’s funny how the world turns on you in a matter of seconds. One second you’re laugh and messing around with people and then all of a sudden everything crashes. This is why sometimes I think of life like one big morbid joke - it messes around with you - throwing you high up and letting you crash straight to the ground. Then..it throws you even higher.

I’m becoming a more private person these days. I stand in front of everyone with this mask of bravado. and it’s mask that’s so well plastered that even when i’m home i wear it still.

Sometimes I still miss her. Sometimes, I just miss myself. But mostly, I miss us.

Oh well…C’est la vie

Don’t expect anything from life. She’ll give you nothing.